So, how are you then?

Recently at work I've had a slew of people who call say "Heather, how are you?" This really bothers me for the following reasons:

1. These people obviously don't give a hack's worth of crap how I'm actually doing.
2. They're calling a business - we're not friends, and I've got things to do that are more important than playing polite on the phone.
3. "Heather, how are you?" is NOT an appropriate response to "This is Heather, how can I help you?" The appropriate response is to TELL ME HOW I CAN HELP YOU AND GET YOU OFF MY GODDAMN PHONE.
4. The people who ask how I'm doing on the phone are like the pretentious assholes who used to come into Target when I worked there and call me by my name, like it was so thoughtful and humanizing that they read my damn name tag.

Maybe there are some people in the world who like it when people who call them for business are polite and nice, like friends. Me? I'd rather just play it straight. You don't care how I'm doing - I don't care how you're doing. You're calling for a reason, so let's just get to that and get on with our lives.

I'm trying to do my job here. Forget friendliness...let's all just be civil and get through this, shall we?